Strength

Greetings!

Well, I finished Sherlock Holmes. The last episode was an emotional and psychological auto accident between a Back to the Future DeLorean and a modern-day, overcharged Tesla, but in a good way, because I cried, also in a good way. I’m also happy to announce that I sort of retained my antique fashion sense. Ish. And my backpack hasn’t broken. *insert smiley face*

I’ve been getting back into The Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit movie series lately. I say ‘getting back’ but it’s really like I’ve never left, not in my heart. I think those movies are some of the best ever made because they’re so long and you always forget what happens, and by the time you watch all six through you’ve forgotten again. Not to mention the amazing camera work. I’m actually in the middle of watching the Battle of Helm’s Deep, which is part of LOTR: The Two Towers. Battles in movies are rising to become my favorite: the Narnia battles, the Battle of the Five Armies, etc. It is, I suppose, the idea of defense and bravery and unity against something terrible and dark that appeals to me, the movement and grief of war and the undying adrenaline that comes with fighting for the sake of life and goodness, the mission and the outcome.

In the Battle of Helm’s Deep, the nation of Rohan is holed up in an ancient stone fortress against the mountains because they’re being hunted by an assembly of vile monsters, including Uruk-hai, bloody-faced mutants bred by Saruman, a wizard turned sour. There’s thousands and thousands of them, and only a few hundred fighting on Rohan’s side. There’s a scene in the movie where the Rohan army is just standing on top of the fortress, looking out at the wide expanse before them, waiting. That’s all they’re doing, is waiting, while imminent doom marches on the horizon, torches blazing, the echo of armored feet thundering against the ground. 

I thought this must be one of the scariest moments that could ever be experienced: staying still, knowing what was coming was inevitable, that the chances for success were miniscule, that the majority of the people standing around you would be dead before the night was through, that your countrymen could end up extinct because of the battle. Picture: the rhythmic stamp of enemy boots are still far off, so it’s a roar on low volume, while everyone else around you is quiet. You smell fear.

Battles like Helm’s Deep render me just a little bit amazed, that people could be so brave. In the Selection series, America Singer once said concerning palace guards, “I found myself admiring them, wondering at the courage it took to run toward danger for the sake of other people,” and as I thought of this quote, I found myself feeling similarly towards soldiers. What does it take to march towards certain death, knowing you would feel the pain and taste of demise? And if you didn’t, that you would know the people, your friends, who would? And what if your name didn’t go down in history books? “A time may come for valor without renown,” Aragorn once said.

It’s the same idea in books. Reading battles is different from watching them, and people may have a preference, but the motif of valiance is always there. What is it like to hear “Take courage, my friends,” shouted out among ranks of fearful companions facing an onslaught of tribulation? 

I think bravery, like love, and hope, and sacrifice, are themes that appeal so much to humanity because true bravery is fueled by just that: love, hope, and the selfless belief in something good. 

Aside from getting all sappy on you, I should probably link this back to real life in a subtle way, so here you go: I have a physics test, a pre-cal test, a statistics test, and a biology test next week and I am mostly scared for the physics one. I know as the time gets closer, the stress will magnify, because if you know me, you’ll know that physics and I are about as close as the Milky Way and the Canis Major Dwarf Galaxy (Google: 236,000,000,000,000,000 km). Going into those tests, I just need to be armed for war (wow can’t get any cheesier than that), but seriously. A teacher once said something along the lines that your pen is your sword going into the battlefield, and that has stuck with me. And entering those exams sometimes feels that way.

Thanks for reading. Now you know what it’s like to be an utter nerd. Feels pretty awesome, right?